Thirteen Steps

To My Crimson Confidant,

You were good to me. I won’t deny that. Loyalty wasn’t an issue, for you were at my beck and call. Whichever whim that bubbled up, you acknowledged and accommodated. Most of the time, I didn’t even have to speak. I’d point and you would take action. Servitude.

Am I ashamed of what I’ve done? No. For the arrangement that I instituted, I feel no remorse. Sure, I cultivated a relationship that really only benefited one side – mine. But you knew what you were getting into. You were aware of my aspirations and, more importantly, the limitations I placed upon our union. You knew that I would only commit for so long; that there’d be a time when I’d set you down and move onto another. I’m a parasite and you, the host, have been exhausted of all utility.

I must leave you now, Canon SD20. You served me well, and for that I thank you. I hope that you can find love again; that the next hands placed upon you are appreciative ones. You deserve to be treated with respect. You deserve to be adjusted appropriately and revered for your stunning hue and undeniably convenient proportions. I know that your next master will prove worthy in this way. She’ll thoroughly read through the instructional PDF document and learn to tame your overzealous flash. She’ll love you as I did and will always consider composition foremost. After all, you have no optical zoom.

Sincerely,
Your Beloved