Thirteen Steps

If I read one more myspace profile that contains the phrase, ‘I love to laugh,’ I’m going to throw up thumb-tacks. No shit? What a valid and original point to make while describing yourself! Do you like to breathe and digest, too? No WAY! We like the same things!

If you find yourself bored, take a look at this. It lists and briefly describes the top fifty assholes in the US. And bravo! on number four. Bra-frickin-vo!

Call me simple, but I love pranks that involve someone opening something only to be jolted by someone hiding inside of said something. Seriously, I love them. Example. Also, I like Sinatra.

This site has cartoons inspired by common subject lines from spam emails. This one cracks me up, today.
OH! This one is good, too.
Ha! I love it!
Another!
Yes!
Yay!
lollerskates!

[If you didn't click each of those, you're missing out. Seriously.]

Dear viewers of The State of The Union who keep going on and on about how great it is that Bush plans to give tax-cuts and credits to us to help with health insurance, the entire proposal only affects those who are with HSA-eligible insurance companies. Do you have a plan through an HSA? Didn’t think so. Please shut up.

While I’m attacking people… No, I didn’t watch the fucking Superbowl. Please stop asking.

OH! I did catch a little of the half-time show while at the bar with Berry. Can we all agree that it’s time for the Rolling Stones to just stop? Show of hands?

For my birthday, Lynn got me The Year of Yes! I’m a couple chapters in and I love it. The writing is brilliant, witty, and candid. If you call and I don’t pick up, this book is the reason for that.

Lynn and I caught Match Point the other night with a couple of friends. Usually, Woody hits the right spot for me, but this film was shit. The directing was base and tacky, the acting was way sub-par, and the dialogue was barely mediocre. And talk about obvious! Gah! It’s the first movie that I’ve walked out of in years. We gave it a fair chance and all [about an hour and a half], but just found ourselves shaking our heads, over and over again. The next day, I learned about the ending… big fecking surprise. What happened, Woody? I will say this, though; the shots of them while in town completely solidified my already concrete desire to move to London as soon as I possibly can. Thanks for that, I guess.

[Oh, Emily Mortimer is thirty-one flavors of cute]

Move news: If a couple things that I’m working on fall into place, I’ll live in San Fran in no more than one month.